wild hearted

Today is the first day of 2018.
And I have decided that this is the year that I will stop rejecting my restless heart.
My wild heart.

You see, ever since I was I young girl, I’ve had this wildness inside of me. This wanting to run, to leap before looking, to travel to all the places. At some point though, somewhere along the road, I learned that this was a bad thing. That people can’t make much or do much when they are constantly changing their minds, or moving, or starting new projects before the glue on the previous one is even dry.

So I tried to change this piece of me.
I looked for things that would define me,
places I could hang my hat,
something that would tame my wildness.
And I was convinced, that once of found this “thing,” my restless heart would finally settle.

And so, for years and years, I’ve been looking.
I’ve looked in apartments
and in relationships
and in jobs.

I’ve looked in different exercise regimes.
and eating plans
and new clothes.

And still, my restless heart has been loud and clear.
Always seeing new adventures on the horizon.

Today is the first day of 2018
and something just feels different about this year…doesn’t it?
I’m putting down the weapon aimed at my wild heart.
I’m loving on her instead.
I will always be someone that tries different workout classes and hobbies.
I will always be a bit of a wanderer.

I may continue to move around a bunch
because being in a new part of town, or a new town altogether,  excites me.
I will teach yoga again, and coach, and write.
I will spend time with my family and spend time abroad.
I will taste all of the things
And none will define me.

Instead, I’ll let my wild heart lead me from adventure to adventure,
my feet getting dirty along the way.

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